Relationship Reflection

The most important relationships in the world to me are those I have with my husband and children.

I have known my husband since I was 16 years old. We dated until I started college and our lives took us on different paths for a few years. We found each other again after my graduation, both a few years older with clearer pictures of what we wanted in life. My husband is my greatest supporter.  We have a true partnership when it comes to raising our three children; we respect each other opinions, work to help each child reach their goals. Although conflicts may arise about the best way to do this, the love we have for each other is never threatened.

High School Sweethearts

Married for life!

The relationships with each of my children are as unique as they are. As a family we enjoy each other’s company, celebrate each other’s accomplishments, console each other during times of need and generally just laugh a lot.

Family vacation in Florida

There are two other groups of people that I have very supportive relationships with. The first is a group of women from my church. We brought a ministry called Women’s Cornerstone to our church. Through this ministry we have come to know each other very well and have formed relationships where there is no judgment, just support and the sharing of our Faith. We can share anything with each other, feel safe about doing it and know that if we are in need, help will always be provided. I would consider these relationships a partnership also because we had the shared vision of bringing this ministry, which holds retreats for women, to our church. We supported each other and recognized each other’s gift. We knew that each of us had something to contribute and if we worked together we would accomplish our goal. The ministry will hold its 6^th retreat this year adding more women to our ministry.

The end of our first retreat!

The second group is the Morristown Adoption Support Group. I found myself a member of this group 7 years ago when it was finally revealed to me at the age of 41 that I was adopted. At my first meeting I met several other late discovery adoptees and felt that I was not alone in my anger, hurt and confusion. Being able to share my story and listen to the stories of other touched by adoption was a great source of healing for me. Our meetings are attended by adult adoptees, adoptive parents and birth parents. From this group I have partnered with several members as we advocate to get the archaic adoption legislation in New Jersey changed. Last year we got a Bill passed in  the  Assembly  and the Senate that would allow adult adoptees access to their original birth certificates only to have the Governor conditionally veto it and let it die. We will begin our advocacy again soon!

New Jersey State Assembly Hearing

“We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are.”
― Anaïs Nin

Over the years I have learned that most relationships fail when trust is broken or the give and take in the relationship is out of balance. When others view your actions through the filter of their world view they can project their own insecurities into a relationship, often causing you to have to constantly defend everything you say or do.  Or you may see others the way you wish to see them and not allow them to be themselves. This is often the demise of many relationships in my opinion.  

In the field of early childhood, developing the ability to form strong relationships and partnerships affects everything we do. For those of us working with infants through 5 year olds, we have to affectively build a teaching team within the classroom.  There are often two to three adults in the classroom and they must be able to communicate and work in harmony to provide the best classroom environment for the children. Each team has to build a relationship with all the other teams and the directors so that shared spaces are cared for and the center is unified in its mission to provide quality child care. Finally creating relationships/ partnerships with the parents of the children in your class also impacts the work that we do. Strong parent partnerships contribute to positive educational outcomes for every child.

When I Think of Child Development

These pictures represent much of what I believe about child development. An adult has provided a safe and stimulating environment and is now letting these children do what they do best. Discover and problem solve together! Blocks is probably my favorite learning center because all areas of development can clearly  be observed. Fine and gross motor skills are challenged and refined with a variety of block types and sizes. Cognitive development of math and science skills such as fractions,patterning, balance and speed are learned. Learning to work together, dealing with frustration as you try to figure out how to get that tower to stand or negotiating with a friend for that last bridge shape block you need to complete your structure shows social/emotional development as well as growth in  language skills. The art of being an early childhood educator is knowing when to scaffold a child's learning and when to just observe with wonder as they learn new skills before our eyes.

Assessment Methods

 Assessment can provide valuable information for educators about a particular child’s skill level. There is a need for some formal standardized assessment but it must be supplemented with teacher observations of the child working within the class setting. Standardized testing gives you just a snapshot of a child’s performance in a setting that is highly stressful for some students. There are many variables in a student’s life that can affect the results of a test given on a particular day.

 In the field of early childhood education, often an overview of a new topic may be given in a large group setting and then reinforced in much smaller groups. Just having the children move to smaller groups of 3-4 children allows for assessment of what was learned during whole group instruction. Reinforcement can take place immediately, as well as, one-on-one instruction if needed.

Also, written observations in each developmental area must be maintained monthly so that anecdotal records of a child’s skills are available. I believe samples of the work from each area should be saved also. The maintaining of these types of records provides teachers with an overview of a child’s development throughout the year and can be an indicator of the need for formal testing when expected developmental milestones are not reached.

A study was published in 2001 entitled Trusting Teacher’s Judgments: A validity study of a curriculum-embedded performance assessment in kindergarten to grade 3. In the study the Work Sampling System, a teacher based assessment with sample collection, was compared to the results of the same student’s scores on the Woodcock-Johnson Psychoeducational Battery-Revised, a standardized test. The results found that the teacher’s judgment was valid and their assessment of children’s learning or special needs were in direct correlation to the results indicated by the standardized test. The teacher’s assessments were conducted as part of the routine instruction with no additional stress to their students.

The International Math and Science Study has been conducted 1995, 1997, 2003 and 2007. It provides information on math and science achievement of United States 4^th and 8^th graders to that of other countries. One of the countries that always scores higher than the US is Japan so I thought I would look at how they assess their students. I was surprised to learn that in Japan they feel a student’s motivation to learn is the most important thing. Teachers use whole class instruction with everyone working at the same pace. Mathematics is presented in terms of concepts rather than calculations, withholding the correct answer, but having the class work as a whole to  come up with as many solutions as possible. It is important to the Japanese that those who do understand help classmates that do not when doing seatwork. In the US we might see that has holding back the advanced students, but in Japan, they see it as a way for those students to cooperate with people of diverse abilities. Learning to interact with others is seen as a form of studying because it is so important in that culture. Tracking and drilling of math skills and facts is not dome until later in junior high when preparing students for high school entrance exams.

Japanese students actually spend more hours studying music, arts & handicrafts, homemaking, physical education, moral education and doing special activities than on math and science. Students participate in activities such as picking flowers and raising rabbits. We may have much to learn from Japan as our system of more time on drilling and testing does not seem to be improving our students understanding of mathematical concepts.

 I am not comfortable with the current focus on standardized test scores in the United States. It has been proven that well trained teachers can evaluate their students learning achievement and needs accurately and effectively without the unnecessary stress and expense of routine standardized tests. We also have something to learn from effective teaching methods of other countries, that rote drilling and teacher lecture are not the most effective ways to instruct school age children.

References

National Center for Educational Statistics. Trends in international mathematics and science study (TIMSS). Retrieved from http://nces.ed.gov/timss/

 Samuel J Meisels, Donna DiPrima Bickel, Julie Nicholson, Yange Xue, & Sally Atkins-Burnett. (2001). Trusting teachers' judgments: A validity study of a curriculum-embedded performance assessment in kindergarten to grade 3. American Educational Research Journal, 38(1), 73.  Retrieved October 15, 2011, from ProQuest Central. (Document ID: 113701421).

Wu, Angela. (1999, January). The Japanese education system: a case study summary and analysis. Research Today. Retrieved from http://www2.ed.gov/pubs/ResearchToday/98-3038.html

Consequences of Stress on Child Development - Corporal Punishment

With my husband’s permission I am sharing part of the story of his childhood.  He was raised by authoritarian parents, where insulting language and physical punishment was the norm. Children opinions were not considered. He and his siblings were often called stupid. Being beaten with hands, as well as, wooden spoons or belts was common. As the boys got older the violence could escalate to actual fist fights with their dad. My husband and his brothers became known as the terrors of the neighborhood often bulling others and getting into fights in school.

Becoming a bully I believe, was actually a coping mechanism for them. My husband was not allowed to express his anger at home or try to defend himself with words so he took it out on others that were defenseless against him. He is not proud of this and has shared his story with our children. Other ways my husband coped was to be very careful not to break the rules and to spend as much time out of the house as possible.

When it came to raising our children, my husband knew he did not want to repeat what his parents had done to him so he said I was in charge of all parenting decisions. Working together I explained my reasons for using more authoritative approach. Teaching him what our children were actually capable of understanding as developmentally. We did not use any type of physical punishment, just lots of redirection and a system of natural and logical consequences.   

My husband has had to do much work to learn to control his anger. He sought counseling and became very involved in his faith and our church.  Inanimate objects are still in danger of being thrown if he is having a particularly tough day.  Most of our friends and his colleges would be shocked to find out that he struggles with self-esteem issues on occasion. Because my husband was strong enough to recognize his emotional challenges and was willing to work on the issues they created, he is a fabulous father with children who turn to him and are willing to discuss anything with him. He has healed some of his relationship with his father; our son was a conduit for that. His father is a completely different man with our son, who spends a part of his summer visiting his grandfather several states away each year.

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A 2008 article published in the Bulletin of the World Health Organization, showed the results of a study conducted in Brazil on the effects of severe physical punishment. The study states that many stressors can affect a child’s mental health and severe physical punishment is one of them. The other main factor was maternal anxiety and depression. The behaviors children in this study exhibited showing external signs of mental health issues were aggression, as well as, vandalism and robbery. Internalized signs were symptoms of depression. The researchers see these as modifiable risk factors and believe intervention and parent education could help parents modify their behavior and adopt healthier parenting techniques.

In doing this research I also found an organization called the Global Initiative to End All Corporal Punishment of Children. There are quotes from children who have participated in research studies around the world. The quotes from some Brazilian children included: from 10-12 year olds “Hitting is useless, it should be talking” & “I think it is very ugly to be beaten” A 13 year old girl said “My father hits for nothing, he hits to see his child cry” and a 14 year old boy “My mother hits me, but not to hurt me, just so that I’ll be a real man when I grow-up”. I found these and other quotes very telling of how children see corporal punishment.

In June 2007, a campaign was launched in Brazil to prohibit corporal punishment by Educate do not Punish, which is a network of institutions that works as a social movement trying to stop all types of corporal punishment.  The have a website where scholarly papers and articles on the effects of corporal punishment can be found. In addition there are manuals for parents. This group establishes trainings for parents and educators.  In 2010,  a Bill was sent by Brazilian President Lula to congress to establish the rights of children to be educated and cared for without the use of corporal punishment.

References

Azevedo, M. A. & Azevedo Guerra, V. N., (2001) Hitting Mania: Domestic corporal punishment of children and adolescents in Brazil, Sao Paulo: IGLU Editoria. Global Initiative to End All Corporal Punishment of Children. Retrieved from http://www.endcorporalpunishment.org/pages/frame.html

Bordin, I. A., Duarte, C. S., Peres, C. A., Nascimento, R., Curto, B. M., & Paula, C.S. (2008, August). Severe physical punishment: risk of mental health problems for poor urban children in Brazil. Bulletin of the World Health Organization. Retrieved from http://www.who.int/bulletin/volumes/87/5/07-043125/en/

Educate do not Punish. Retrieved from http://www.naobataeduque.org.br/site/reforma_legal/brasil.php

Child Development and Public Health- Immunizations

 Immunization is a topic that often comes up for discussion at my place of work, a childcare center serving infants 6 weeks through Kindergarten.  In the state of New Jersey there are many required vaccinations for children before they enter a childcare setting or public school. The state of New Jersey in 2008 became the first state to require flu shots for any child enrolled in daycare or preschool starting at the age of 6 months through 5 years of age. Every child each year must receive their flu shot by December 31 or risk not being able to attend.

We have several parents each year that refuse to have their child immunized at all because they fear the safety of the shots. In New Jersey you are allowed to claim religious exemption for immunizations. What need to be supplied as proof may vary greatly from center to center, some accepting a note from the parents others requesting official letterhead and signature from your place of worship.

The linking of immunizations and the rise in children with autism has impacted many parents’ opinions of their safety. New Jersey has the highest autism rate in the country. A 2007 report by the CDC stated that our reporting rates may just be more accurate, therefore higher, because the state has such an aggressive program to find these children early and provide early intervention services. I have a nephew with autism and have seen the success of early intervention.

On a personal note, my oldest daughter had a severe reaction to DTaP immunization as an infant. She ran a fever of 105 degrees and I have never heard a cry, like the one coming from her, before or since that very scary night. She continued to receive the rest of her immunizations, as did my other children, adjusting her DTaP shot to avoid a reaction. I believe the risk of disease and their complications outweighs the risk of the immunizations. I believe many parents now think these diseases have been wiped out and there is no longer a need for immunizations. They only need to look at countries such as Somalia where routine immunization is not the norm to see the tragic results of not having access to something we in the United States take for granted.

The World Health Organization reported that, as of July, there were 1019 suspected cases of measles and 31 related deaths so far for 2011 in Somalia. The children there are highly susceptible to complications from measles due to poor nutrition and lack of clean drinking water. Most of the children who die or suffer the most severe complications are 5 years of age and under. There is an ongoing effort to bring the vaccine to this region and immunize more children. The stability of the region greatly affects access.

References

Injury Board National News Desk. (2009, January 5). Flu vaccine mandatory for New Jersey children. Retrieved from http://news.injuryboard.com/flu-vaccine-mandatory-for-new-jersey-children.aspx?googleid=254536

University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey, (2007, February 8). CDC releases study of autism rates nationwide, including New Jersey. Retrieved fromhttp://www.umdnj.edu/about/news_events/releases/07/r020807_CDCReleases_StudyofAutismRates.htm

World Health Organization. (2011, August 19). Suspected measles cases rising steeply in south central Somalia. Retrieved from http://www.who.int/hac/crises/som/en/index.html

Childbirth Experiences

I have been blessed to give birth to three beautiful children. I am sharing the story of the birth of my first child, my daughter Rachele. My husband and I had only been married for two months when I discovered I was pregnant. We had planned on trying to conceive after being married a year and often refer to her as our insta- baby as she was at the celebration of our one year wedding anniversary. My pregnancy was uneventful and progressed normally.

On the evening I went into labor we had been out with a group of friend celebrating a birthday.  I woke my husband up around 12:00 AM to tell him it was time. I was screened upon arrival and admitted to labor and delivery. I had strong contraction and progressed well through most of the morning. I had taken Lamaze classes and was trying to have a drug free birth. The next morning my doctor arrived but my labor had stalled, although I was contracting I was not dilating. The chosen course of action was to administer Pitocin, a drug that is commonly used to enhance labor. Several minutes after it administration Rachele’s heart stopped.  I was place on my left side, then my right to see if it was possibly the umbilical cord being compressed, there was no change. It was decided that a cesarean section was needed so I was immediately wheeled to the operating room. I could hear my doctor yelling to get an anesthesiologist as I would need general anesthesia; there was no time to wait for an epidural to take effect. Because of that my husband was not allowed in the delivery room and the last thing I remember is the nurse literally pouring the antiseptic on my abdomen. I was not awake to see my first baby enter the world. Her Apgar score was a 2 but at five minutes it was a 7. My first few days as a new mom were very stressful. Rachele was in the NICU being monitored and tested and I had an infection in my incision so I was not allowed to see her. My husband found a sympathetic nurse and they snuck her out of the NICU, tubes and all, to my room for a few minutes so I could look at her. It was 3 days before I got to nurse her for the first time.

I chose this example of a personal birth experience because access to appropriate medical care is critical to improved birth rate and healthy outcome for babies. In this instance the drug most likely caused my daughters issue but without it I may have been one of those women who could not deliver or whose labor went on for too long causing harm to her or her baby. My labor stalled during my next two deliveries also. I was closely monitored and giving an epidural before the administering of Pitocin so that if I need another C-section I would be awake and my husband could be present. The C-sections were gratefully not needed. My daughter was in a hospital with a state of the art NICU and received the best of care. She is now a healthy 22 year old.

I believe the type of delivery and interventions needed afterward affect early development. As a young child my daughter couldn’t wear certain types of clothing because she found them irritating. She woke up in the middle of the night until she was 2; she went right back to sleep but just needed to know we were there. She is very independent and needs to have a sense of control, I believe this stems from her separation from me and all the poking and prodding she went through those first days of her life. Nancy Newton Verrier makes reference to this in her book The Primal Wound: Understanding the Adopted Child which I read after finding out I was adopted at 40. Verrier writes about how early trauma is carried with us forever and that NICU babies and adoptees often have similar traits. I find that interesting because people often comment that she has similar personality traits to me. Now I wonder if they are genetic or cause by the traumas surrounding our births.

I researched childbirth in Jamaica, my husband and I spent our honeymoon there. We had the opportunity to leave our opulent resort and see some of the country where the poverty level of the Jamaican people was obvious.  In a 1995 article in Midwifery Today, a midwife in Negril was highlighted. There is one clinic in the area where the expectant mothers can come for prenatal care once a week. They can wait for hours on hard wooden benches to be seen by the staff that consists of a registered nurse, a licensed midwife, a nurse practitioner and a public health nurse. Two doctors share duties four days a week. The midwife attends most of the births and travels by taxi. She has converted a room in her own home into a birthing room and sterilizes her instruments by boiling them. For equipment she has a blood pressure cuff, a stethoscope, a fetoscope and birthkit. She has no oxygen, suction equipment, fluids or emergency transportation. The nearest hospital is more than an hour away.  The Jamaican government regulates what she can get paid for attending births to about $20 US, but most can’t even afford to pay her that. This is much different to the shiny floors and comfortable birthing room I arrived to. Attending doctors being on call 24hrs a day, several nurses, anesthesiologists and others.  My bill was much different also.

References

Verrier, N. (1993). Primal Wound: Understanding the Adopted Child. LeVerne, TN: Ingram Book Company.

Whitefield, Kathleen.  (1995, June). Midwifery in Jamaica. Midwifery Today and Childbirth Education,(2), 13.  Retrieved September 8, 2011, from ProQuest Central. (Document ID: 613221471).

Examining Codes of Ethics

These ideals were taken from the NAEYC and DEC codes of ethics.

NAEYC

I-1.2—To base program practices upon current knowledge and research in the field of early childhood education, child development, and related disciplines, as well as on particular knowledge of each child.

This ideal reflects my professional belief that as educators we must be aware of current research and be willing to change our teaching styles to reflect what is now known about how children learn and develop while keeping in mind the developmental needs of each child.

I-2.4—To listen to families, acknowledge and build upon their strengths and competencies, and learn from families as we support them in their task of nurturing children.

Family members are a child’s first teacher and have a depth of knowledge about each child in our care. We need to reach out to families with great respect for all the insight they have about their child so that we can forge a supportive relationship. So much of what we do each day is to support families and be a resource for them as they raise their children.

 I-3A.3—To support co-workers in meeting their professional needs and in their professional development.

Early childhood teachers within a center need to work together as a team helping to train those new to the field and to encourage professional growth for all staff. Opportunities for training and current resources should be shared by employers to keep all staff knowledgeable of developments within the field.

DEC

We shall serve as advocates for children with disabilities and their families and for the professionals who serve them by supporting both policy and programmatic decisions that enhance the quality of their lives.

As early childhood educators we are often the first people to notice that a child might have a learning disability. This is challenging position to be in but we must be advocates for the children in our care if we believe they need more services than we are qualified to provide. Talking to our directors and then to parents about concerns we have can be difficult but seeing a child get the services they need is very rewarding.

We shall demonstrate our respect and concern for children, families, colleagues, and others with whom we work, honoring their beliefs, values, customs, languages, and culture.

As professionals in the early childhood field we have the opportunity to teach young children about acceptance of others before they are influenced by the bias of society. They see all the children and adults in their school as potential friends and learning about each other’s customs is such a rich and fascinating learning experience for them. It is one of my favorite reasons for working with this age.

We shall be responsible for protecting the confidentiality of the children and families we serve by protecting all forms of verbal, written, and electronic communication.

Confidentiality is a key element in building a trusting relationship with the families of the children in our care. They often need to share very private matters about their families so we can adequately care for their child’s developmental needs, they must be confident that anything they share will be held in the strictest confidence in order to be able to do that.

Resources

The Division for Early Childhood. (2000, August). Code of ethics. Retrieved May 26, 2010, from
http://www.dec-sped.org/

NAEYC. (2005, April). Code of ethical conduct and statement of commitment. Retrieved May 26, 2010, from http://www.naeyc.org/files/naeyc/file/positions/PSETH05.pdf